Monday, April 25, 2005

Don't Try This At Home

The fine print disclaimers are getting way out of hand. I say if you hoist a Ford F150 up in the air in your garage with a cable and "a single steel bolt" and walk around underneath it, you are asking for it to fall on you and kill your dumbass. "Professional Driver Closed Course" well...duh? People just can't be trusted to take themselves out with their own stupidity anymore. Too many lawsuits and too many lawyers that will take them. Why can't you drive a Hummer off-road? I thought that's why they made them.

Can we go back and see what happened to the ABC "Extreme Home Makeover" houses in about 3 years. My guess is that all the 50in. Plasma screens will be long gone and these folks will have turned their new home into a shithole similar to the one they used to have. A few months ago I believed the hype and started watching the show, crying like a baby when they moved the bus. These people were enduring medical hardship and financial problems etc. Now I am a little more cynical. Bullhorn Boy needs to pull up and yell..."Get your big ass off the couch and fix your own shit for a change!" It's a 60 minute ad for Sears and Ty, while still cute to the wife, has become annoying as hell to me. I would like to lock Michael "the fagool" in a room with Drake for a couple of hours to see what they come up with. Now that would be entertaining TV! I'm sure it would beat the hell out of CBS's two hour suckfest "Killer Locusts" from last night...Whoever thought that one up should have a pickup dropped on their head.

3 Comments:

Blogger J. Francis Lehman said...

That Locusts thing had Lucy Lawless in it; the last thing she did was Xena, and I don't think CBS could get away with implying that she eats locusts, them bein' a big network an' all...

April 25, 2005 at 2:42 PM  
Blogger Joe said...

It's bullshit like Locusts that convinces me even more that original ideas must be a class E felony if they occur within the confines of Los Angeles county. Ignorant, unimaginative, stupid motherfuckers.

April 25, 2005 at 5:51 PM  
Blogger Motown Mike said...

I want to see Bob Vila go down to Orange Mound and start a series "This Old Crack House". What kind of spackle do you use to cover up bullet holes?

April 26, 2005 at 6:11 AM  

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